It has been awhile since I shared a pet peeve. It's one of those subjects never discussed, a dirty little secret of sorts. Yet something I notice all the time in public women's bathrooms. You ladies all know what I am talking about - women who pee on toilet seats.
I mean what's up with that?
The thing is, I'm guessing most of us can plead guilty to this at one time or another because it is drilled into all girly girls that we must not ever, under any circumstances, actually sit on a public toilet seat. Which means we have to learn to pee while squatting and that is when the potential dribble occurs. OK, I'll be the first to confess, I've done it myself. But at least I have the decency to clean up for the next person.
In fact, I believe I have refined if not perfected a Squat, Swipe and Kick/Flush technique. It goes something like this:
Perch yourself over the toilet. It really works best as a squat, like if you have ever lifted weights, a true squat with your butt stuck out in an unseemly fashion. This allows for proper balance (even in stilettos) and ensures that you are actually over the toilet bowl as opposed to the seat.
Wipe, but hold onto to the toilet paper for a second longer as you quickly peruse the seat to see if any dribbling has occurred. If so, use the paper to quickly swipe the seat clean, then drop the paper into the toilet. Turn and flush using a karate-like kick of the handle. Voila. It's quick, it's efficient and no flesh ever touches a questionable surface.
Don't even talk to me about how I handle all the Porta-Johns I encounter at these outdoor art fairs.......